If he is jealous, then he loves - this is what most people think. And vice versa, if he loves, he will be jealous. What does it mean? This means that in the modern world, love often chooses jealousy as its companion. But if you look at it, the feeling of jealousy does not bring any positive emotions, moreover, it is painful for both the object and the subject of jealousy.
Jealousy can kill love and destroy a family. In addition, constant worries and doubts can cause serious illness. It is not for nothing that they say "All diseases are from the nerves," and indeed, our nervous system completely controls the human body, and the psyche is directly connected with the nervous system.
Thus, emotions that cause changes at the mental level often lead to the fact that the functioning of internal organs is also impaired. "Sick with love", "sick with melancholy" - these expressions that have come into use are direct evidence of the above.
Almost every day we use such expressions as "take it to heart", "I cannot stomach it", "my head is spinning", "stands in the throat", "it hurts to see", etc., which indicates that our emotions and physical sensations are closely related to each other.
What is jealousy? Jealousy is not one feeling, but a complex of feelings. This complex of feelings has a more powerful destructive effect, as if only one of the indicated list of feelings was acting.
Jealousy directs the first blow to the head. Even painkillers often do not help with such a headache. The next stage is nervous disorders. Relationships inevitably begin to deteriorate, as jealousy is the cause of aggression.
The main feature of jealousy is that a person begins to see his property in another person, and jealousy can be directed not only towards a spouse or wife (bride or groom), but also friends, parents and children.
If we are jealous, then we begin to notice how much attention is paid to us, and how much to others, and, of course, we feel deprived and less loved. To fight jealousy, it is necessary, first of all, to understand the reasons behind it. Let's designate them:
1. Engagement in relationships - you view this or that person as property. You deprive him of the right to have any desires and deny him free will. You put him on a pedestal. You regard it as the meaning of your life. One way or another, but the fear of being abandoned must be overcome, otherwise you risk ruining your relationship with your loved ones with your own hands. Hating imaginary rivals fails to make relationships stronger. Remember, each person is an individual, do not deprive him of freedom.
2. Like attracts like - if you do not immediately reject the possibility of betraying your loved one, then (without realizing it yourself) you admit the idea that there may be another man in your life. Before you become jealous of a loved one, think about whether you are flirting with someone who shows you signs of attention.
3. You are not sure of yourself. “Why did he choose me?” - if you ask yourself such a question, then you have a fear that a better replacement will be found for you. Lack of confidence in yourself (or in your attractiveness) is the reason for your jealousy. Love yourself, learn to appreciate yourself. If you do this, then the people around you will also appreciate you. Remember that every person is unique and be yourself. Get only positive emotions from communicating with people dear to you.
4. Distrust. Your relationship with your loved one can develop in two ways. First, you don't trust him. Nevertheless, you try to maintain the relationship, while not letting your loved one go further than a meter from you, and control his every step. Naturally, you live in constant worry and worry. The second way is that you trust your loved one. As a result, you live in peace and enjoy communicating with him.
5. For the basis of your relationship, you choose the phrase "jealous, so he loves." However, the feeling of love can be expressed in much more appropriate ways. For example, this can be done using words or an SMS message. Your intonation and movement are also testimonies of your love. Jealousy is associated with distrust and constant suspicion, it is not a means of expressing love, as it brings only negative emotions.
If you are still overcome by a feeling of jealousy, but you want to eliminate this feeling, then the following tips will help you fix yourself.
1. Treat your partner with a sense of trust. Imagine that with your distrust, you undeservedly offend him. You cannot change anything for the better, tormented by suspicions and doubts, you can only destroy all the best. Your loved one may, for example, have the following thoughts: does not trust, it means that he no longer loves; why be faithful if she doesn't trust me. Think about it and stop driving your relationship to a standstill.
2. Stop controlling your loved one. Excessive attention (for example, the twenty-fourth call to work) will only annoy your loved one. You should not put a man in a dependent position and determine his every step.
3. Believe in yourself, in your attractiveness. Love yourself and others will love you. The attention of men, as a rule, is aimed at those women whose heads are proudly raised and their shoulders are straightened.
4. Find yourself a job. Passion, work will help drive away from you unfounded thoughts about betrayal of a person dear to you. Think: you will get rid of jealousy, and you will earn respect from your loved one, and, in the end, you will do something useful.
So, if you want a calm, happy life without the stress of resentments and worries, then you need to forget about jealousy as soon as possible. Cherish every day spent next to someone close to you, do not waste time on clarifying the relationship due to jealousy. Love and be loved!